Day 82, Sunday schmunday

Boyo these weekends are getting tougher to deal with, let me tell ya. And seemingly for no apparent reason, nothing clear has pooped its head up in front of me and given me a clearly defined answer. Annoying, it is.

For me, weekends have always been a challenge to keep anything--resolutions, projects, hobbies, potential life creating paths, etc.--going for as long as it’ll last. I know I mentioned this before, ages ago it seems, but the weekends are really just treasure troves of temptations for me and as the project is continuing on its way as well as getting closer to its end, all at the same time, well these past weekends have infamously become grueling mental and physical challenges.

In fact, I recall just yesterday wiling away the mid afternoon hours on my bed reading page after countless page of a new book all the while trying not to focus on the packages of dried fruit sitting on the kitchen counter, or the soy yogurt (peach and vanilla and delicious strawberry) chilling away in the refrigerator, or the delectable cinnamon raisin whole wheat bread and the vegan cream cheese resting in drawers in the fridge.

How screwy it was. How beguiling! What tricks my mind played with me.

Of course, I was able to stave off the temptation and keep my sticky fingers to themselves and out of the potential food overload that would have taken place had I let my mind wander. Not that I was even hungry or anything, just bored, and you know what boredom can do to something like a diet and exercise plan.

Hee hee. All this worry over some yogurt and fruit. Funny. I’m still amazed at my newfound conscientiousness and the power it has over my everyday life and actions. Had one of these long weekends occurred before the project began the I would have been in the kitchen straightaway pulling object after object out of the fridge and collapsing onto my couch with a great sigh, ready for the feast that I’d be partaking in. Remembering those times also brings to mind the couple hours after the great gorging when my body would react to all of the food and begin cursing my weak willed mind for letting it stuff itself with all of that crap.

I’m sitting pretty now, about to go and enjoy squatting jumpropes, and imagining life after the project.

It’s filled with fruit and vegetables, and more jumproping.

Day 6, Vices

You never know what you've got until it's gone.

Before the project started on May 15th dinnertime was a good fifteen to thirty minutes spent spooning food into my mouth, or chopsticking it into there, while watching television or the computer. A horrible habit, I know. Dinner was usually whatever my eyes fell on first when I swung open the pantry door. More often than not, though, dinner for me was "comfort food". You see, I eat dinner after work at the karate school where I'm teaching five hours of classes numbering about twenty to thirty, sometimes more.

So you can see why comfort food is so downright, well, comforting after a day like that.

My bigggest addiction, and something I would eat frequently (three times a week was not uncommon) was a bowl ful of short grain white rice and orzo pasta cooked in water with vegetable buillon and garlic powder and then sprinkled with soy saice. I love it, but that's a lot of unnecessary carbohydrates to be taking in three times a week. Maybe once every other week would be slightly better for me, but even then...

My other addiction is fruit juice. That in itself doesn't sound bad and it's not hugely horrible, I only drink stuff labeled 100% fruit juice and I try not to overdo it. Sometimes it does get the better of me as I've used it as a replacement for all of the soda I used to drink. The problem with that is that I've learned that you should not drink the majority of your daily calories, it offsets things. Plus, unless it an alcoholic beverage, the no real social aspect to drinks like there is for food so it's very easy to not pay attention to what you're taking in.

(By the way, if you wonderful readers have any suggestions for low or preferably no caffeine drinks with no calories I would really appreciate them. Thanks)

Now that dinnertime, or anytime, has become more of an event for me (no more mindless Pop-Tart eating, another habit) I've been willingly forced to watch what I'm cooking and drinking instead of just picking some junk from the freezer and frying it in oil. It takes a lot more work and thought and, believe me, giving up those comfort foods is damn tough (they're called comfort foods for a reason) but to succeed with something like this or anything else you have to look toward the end result as well as how much better you feel now and weigh the potential benefits against your present cravings. Ask yourself, is it really worth it to sacrifice wonderful health and a great, fit body for a bowl of rice and orzo pasta (or macaroni and cheese or mashed potatoes and gravy)?

It's not for me anymore, I can see that now, and I'm loving the food that I am eating (all the extra effort seems to make it tastier). And you know what? I'm totally cool with that.